


Call the Exterminator

by lilacsilver



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Darcy is a SHIELD agent because why not, F/M, Gen, giant ants, giant ants everywhere
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-22
Updated: 2012-12-22
Packaged: 2017-11-22 01:10:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/604163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilacsilver/pseuds/lilacsilver
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's a swarm of giant ants in the city. Captain America, meet Agent Lewis. [Response to a Tumblr prompt.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

            “Great. This is just freaking _great_.” It’s Darcy’s third official day on the job, and there’s a swarm of eight-foot-tall, thousand-pound ants thundering around the city streets. She can’t remember the protocol for giant insects, which probably means she’s going to fail whatever SHIELD’s got in the way of performance reviews.

            “This way!” a voice shouts. The group in front of her, a bunch of screaming tourists, turns and starts running toward the voice. So does she, because holy shit, there’s an angry ant headed straight for them. She has a moment to reflect on how much creepier ants are when they’ve been mad-scienced to the size of a truck, and then a hand yanks her inside what appears to be a café.

            “Miss, are you all right?” It’s the voice from before, and it belongs to…Captain freaking America.

            So of course those are the first words out of her mouth. “You’re Captain freaking America.”

            “Er, yes, I am. Are you okay?”

            She starts shaking. God, she really, really hates ants. It occurs to her that he’s waiting for an answer, but she remembers those awful biting jaws and can’t say anything else.

 _Oh, yeah, you’re gonna make a **great** agent_ , says a tiny, nasty voice in the back of her head. _One little infestation and you get nervous. Woman up, Lewis!_

            Hey, that’s right. She’s Darcy Lewis, newbie SHIELD agent and (hopefully) the vanquisher of a few of these damned ants. She can’t quite get the shaking under control, but she grins up at the Captain, showing all her teeth.

            “Doing just fine, Cap. Agent Lewis at your service. You need help kicking ass out there?”

            He blinks at her. “You’re a SHIELD agent? You don’t look like…I mean…”

            “I get that a lot.” She glances at the people huddled behind overturned tables and chairs, sees one of them pointing out the window, and turns just in time to see an ant about to charge the café. It’s bigger than any of the others she’s seen, with much bigger jaws.

            It’s a soldier. Apparently the person responsible for this didn’t just stick to messing with ordinary worker ants. The Captain grabs his shield, but before he can head outside, the soldier-ant is blasted out of the way. A red-and-gold bullet streaks past the windows; Iron Man has arrived.

            “That’s my cue,” the Captain says. “And, uh…we might be able to use your help out there.”

            She grins again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you can see, I went ahead and wrote a part 2. It's nearly twice as long as the first chapter, because I got carried away. (I regret nothing).

            It’s protocol for agents to carry a radio even when off-duty, so Darcy isn’t too surprised when hers beeps to life. She _is_ kind of surprised to hear Tony Stark hailing her, but supposes it was the work of but a moment for him to find the right frequency.

            “ _Cap says you’re with us, Agent. Does your boss know about this?_ ”

            “He probably will soon. I am _not_ looking forward to that meeting,” she replies, shooting at an ant. The bullet – her last bullet – only makes it madder.

            “ _I promise to cry at your funeral if he kills you,_ ” Stark says.

            Black Widow cuts in then. “ _I’ll argue your case to Fury, Agent Lewis. Now, will both of you shut up and fight?_ ”

            Darcy says nothing to either of them, mostly because she’s out of ammo and the ant she pissed off is gearing up to strike. Of all the ways for Mama Lewis’ daughter to die, this is quite possibly the worst and the weirdest. She wonders vaguely what cover story SHIELD will give her parents.

            She looks to her left: nothing. To her right: an uprooted stop sign. The sign itself is crumpled, but the metal post is fine. It’s kind of heavy, though, as she discovers when she reaches to pick it up. But she breathes in, out, and swings the post at the ant’s head with a yell.

            “Why – won’t – you – just – die!” she screams, hitting it again. She successfully knocks its two front legs out from under it, but it gets back up. _Damn it to the fiery depths of hell_ , she thinks.

            “ _There are four more headed your way, Agent Lewis_ ,” Hawkeye warns her.

            “Fuck! I could use some help here!”

            “ _Hulk is two blocks east of you and closing.”_

            She hears the Hulk roar, and looks down the street to see him knocking ants together as he charges toward her. He’s at her side in less than twenty seconds.

            “ **Tiny agent** ,” he acknowledges with a rumble.

            “Hulk.”

            No more is said, because he gets back to the business of smashing as she swings her signpost again. (He does not seem impressed by her efforts, but that’s neither here nor there).

\--

 

            Finally, _finally_ , the swarm dwindles to nothing. Dead and injured ants litter the streets, and Darcy tries to sneak away before SHIELD arrives to start the cleanup for two reasons. One, she’s not supposed to be on duty right now, and two, she’s _definitely_ not supposed to be fighting alongside the Avengers.

            She doesn’t get far, because Tony Stark has a big mouth. “Where’s the newbie agent?”

            “Who’s that?” Coulson asks.

            “Newbie Agent Lewis. Y’know, the curvy little brunette. She was out there with us.”

            Shit. Darcy knows she’s caught, so she edges around the SHIELD van into Coulson’s line of sight, hoping she doesn’t look _too_ guilty. He catches her eye, and his expression (as usual) gives nothing away.

            “Care to explain, Agent Lewis?”

            “I…um.” She tries to think of something that doesn’t sound completely ridiculous, but can’t.

            Coulson nods. “I see. I expect you to be more articulate in your incident report.”

            “…I’m not in trouble?”

            “Not with me. Director Fury might be another story.”

            Darcy whimpers involuntarily. Tony smirks at her and wanders off, and Coulson turns to the rather pressing task of overseeing the removal of the dead ants.

            Somebody touches her shoulder, startling her. It’s Agent Romanoff, who looks briefly apologetic.

            “I’ll speak to Fury,” she says.

            “You will?”

            “I said I would, didn’t I? You did well out there, and I personally see no reason for you to get in trouble.”

            Darcy nods. “Uh, thanks.”

            “You’re welcome. Now, I believe the Captain would like a word with you.” The other woman walks away to speak to Coulson, and the Cap takes her place by Darcy.

            “Thanks for the help,” he smiles. She can’t help but stare, because he’s got a hell of a smile and she’s only human. He blushes under her scrutiny, which is just all kinds of adorable.

            “You’re very welcome,” she practically purrs. His blush deepens and he looks away. She feels kind of bad for embarrassing him, so she pats him on the arm and hopes he takes it as an apology.

            “You’re beautiful when you fight,” he blurts, and then actually claps a hand over his mouth. She stares some more, this time in shock.

            “Whoa, there. Where did _that_ come from?” she asks.

            He lowers his hand, clears his throat, and refuses to meet her eyes. “Um…can we forget I said that?”

            “Oh, hell no. You can’t just drop a compliment like that on me and expect me to ignore it.”

            “I’m sorry,” he says.

             She looks up at him and takes a chance. “Are you free for dinner tomorrow night?”


End file.
